engagement, marriage and life planning

As you get older, as you walk through the passage of time, you find more and more people around you moving on to other stages of life while you are stuck in a stasis.

that is not a good feeling. it's not as if you don't want to move on, its just you don't know how.

when more and more people move on to other stages of life after uni, beyond work, to finding a life partner and you are still alone, all you feel is envy, fear, thinking "where the hell is my man?!"

i would like to think that i'm not desperate and i know i cannot be desperate because that would just lead to making wrong life changing decisions but at this age and you have people either a couple of years younger than you, or a couple of years older than you or the same age as you in a long term relationship planning to get hitched, engaged or already married it leads you to think "what in the world am i doing?" "why arent i in a relationship yet when so many of my friends are getting settled?" and you start to panic and self-pity and think about how to spend the rest of your life single with 5 cats or terrapin or whatever.

its not too early now to plan your life because planning is one thing, reality is another. sigh.